Wisdom from Life Experiences: Reflections from Montana

Almost two years ago, I embarked upon a major life change. After living by the ocean in California for 30 years, my family and I moved to the beautiful mountains of NW Montana. We closed our businesses, said goodbye to many loved ones and friends, and dove headfirst into the unknown adventures awaiting us - and all at the beginning of winter!

I've lived a lot of life since arriving, so much I've experienced that it feels like a lifetime, and much of it has not been easy. No matter where you go or where you live, life will always hold challenges. My heart is grateful for all of it and filled with joy to spend this season of my life here.

Now that we're in fall and gearing up for winter, I'm starting to slow down. Or at least just enough to compile my experiences thus far and share these three things with you.

Remember to face the sun.

"The same boiling water that softens the potato hardens the egg. It's about what you're made of, not the circumstances."

Life can be difficult, but I always find hope in knowing that the sun is shining somewhere, even when I can't see it. I've let it be my mantra, a soft and gentle voice repeating, turn your face to the sun. I listen for this voice, especially during difficult times.

Where I live in Montana, sunflowers grow easily and abundantly. You have to exert effort not to have them grow in your yard. Last year, I wanted a garden full of them, so I planted numerous seeds. I was so excited when I saw the many sprouts and attentively watched them grow, until one morning when I woke to discover that the deer had eaten them all right as they began to flower.

So, this year, I had a new plan, to put up fencing before they flowered. I was going to make it so the deer wouldn't even have a chance. I again planted a large number of seeds and patiently waited for sprouts. I waited and waited, but nothing was sprouting. Until one morning, I saw one. Just one lone sunflower sprout that arose from the many that were planted.

Day after day, I watched this plant steadily begin to grow. Whenever we watered, my daughter and I would talk in amazement about how it stood bravely alone. Day by day, it grew bigger and bigger, until it eventually towered above my windows at over 12 feet tall, but it still had yet to bloom.

Every morning, I watched the head of the flower face directly east, towards the rising sun. Then slowly it would turn so that by evening, it faced directly west, towards the setting sun. Whether the sky was sunny or cloudy, it always followed the sun. It was as if I could hear this flower whisper, Remember, turn your face to the sun.

Then, on the very first day of fall, it finally bloomed. It's beautiful, and long yellow petals radiantly came forth, ever so happy to embrace the sun that guided its growth journey. Another beautiful message was imparted: We all bloom in our own perfect time.

Life is continuously expanding and contracting.

Breathe. Everything is always on time. Walk in faith knowing that you are exactly where you're meant to be. Be present. Be grateful. Be patient.

Life is an unceasing dance between expansion and contraction. Nothing in nature escapes this rhythm. A few days ago, I was walking my dogs and caught a most beautiful sight in the sky. Hundreds, if not thousands, of birds were exhibiting this harmonious rhythm. Seemingly to a tempo all of their own, they flew towards one another, creating a compacted, dark ball in the sky, then gracefully spread back out in balletic patterns. I watched this elegant dance for a while—contraction, expansion, contraction, expansion, my breath started to follow their rhythm.

Over and over, and without hesitation, this dance is repeated in nature. Spring and summer expand, fall and winter contract. How often do we forget this rhythm? How often do we forget to breathe? How often do our thoughts and emotions keep us stuck in one cycle or the other?

Let us not become rigid, unbending, and unyielding to life. Let us not forget that we've been invited to the most magical ball of all and step boldly and elegantly into this dynamic, dazzling, breathtakingly glorious dance of life.

Live in Gratitude

"We can't always have what we want, but we can always want what we have." ~Fr. Mike Schmitz

Gratitude changes everything. It softens the hard edges of our hearts so we can give and receive. It opens our eyes to see past the bindings of our mind. Gratitude reminds us just how miraculous life is. We are beings made up of trillions of cells, all of which had to form perfectly together. Exquisitely born with a unique and purposeful soul and divinely bestowed a multitude of talents and gifts to fulfill that purpose. I was made to be here, you were made to be here, for exactly this time.

God doesn't create anything by accident. There is nothing overlooked, nothing forgotten. Nothing, by mistake. He handed over a perfect and beautiful world for us to fill with our boundless creativity and love. Trials of life will try to persuade us otherwise. Difficulty in the absence of gratitude causes doubt to creep in. We lose faith that what we have is enough, thinking, "If I only had more. If this didn't happen or that didn't happen, I would be able to be happy." 

It doesn't help that society constantly overwhelms us with messages that we are not enough until we have more, specifically, more things. But none of these things will feed our souls; they only feed our wants. And none of these things truly enrich our lives or our experience of them, until we care more about the state and fate of our souls and live gratitude as a verb rather than an adjective. We have already been given exactly what we need to be everything our creator meant us to be. Once we see that, our eyes will be opened to the unending and countless blessings showered upon us.

Gratitude is a practice; it takes effort. Like anything else, starting may be hard, but the more you practice, the easier it becomes, and eventually, it becomes a habit. Every morning you awake, choose one thing you are grateful for, and pick a new one each day. Do the same before you go to bed. With everything you acknowledge, also notice what it offers you and how it makes you feel, so that again, gratitude itself becomes an experience.

For instance, if you express gratitude for clean, running water, imagine yourself effortlessly filling a glass to drink and how the cool water quenches your thirst. How thankful we can be, not to have to walk miles just to fill a bucket or have no water nearby at all. We take so much for granted; being in a state of gratitude can help us not.

In the end, we're only rich for what we carry in our hearts, never for what's exterior to ourselves.

Simplicity is a kind of sanctuary.